The Russo Legacy 2.1

What did happen last time? Oh right…

Ariel was emolliated.

The Marla&Darla duo were incompetent and inseparable.

Ivy, poor Ivy, she just epitomized the sorry-sack feelings of Joe Purdy’s song, “Can’t Get it Right Today.”

Jonas grew up to be awkward and yet acceptable.

ONWARDS!

Jonas:  "ALL HAIL JONAS, THE KID GENIUS."

Jonas: "Do you want to hail your baby genius?"

YOU NEED TO GET OUT ALREADY.

The saving grace of this family, I swear.

 

SATAN BEGONE.

Now it’s up to Jonas to carry the entirety of the Russo Legacy upon his little, argyled shoulders. 

THE FUTURE OF THE RUSSOS RESTS UPON YOUR LOINS, KID.

Jonas: “My…loins?”

Yep.  Your tender, hopefully fertile and promiscuous loins.

Climbing the prestigious prestidigitator ladder, I see.

JONAS IS AN ADEPT BUSINESSMAN.

Genes please?

………….Something happened to Jonas.

This entire post is one long apology note to the Russos, sheesh.

Ghost!Ariel:  “TRASH! ALL OF IT, TRASH.”

Wait, what is? What are you so angry abo—

Ghost!Ariel:  “WOULD YOU JUST LOOK AT THOSE WEEDS.”

Oh.  The Russo legacy is in shambles, god.

Jonas earns a gold badge in gardening (OMG EGGPLANTS YOU GUYS SERIOUSLY) and consequently is able to pep-talk the plants, reminding them of brighter days ahead.

SOMETHING IS HAPPENING.

*pop*

I am so sorry; I never meant for it to be this way!

D:

I am a horrible simgod who lets her sims suffer and despair all over the place. 

SocialBunny!:  “Awyiss, that’s the spot.  I didn’t even realize I was carrying all that tension around!”

Jonas:  “Well, I had to express my gratitude somehow that you weren’t one of those psycho bunnies out to get me.  You know, like in the movies and junk.”

SocialBunny!:  “Heh, oh… Right, kid.” 

Jonas:  *ARE YOU KIDDING ME DID I NOT JUST GIVE HIM THAT BACKRUB I SWEAR TO GOD*

SocialBunny!:  omnomnom

Ivy:  "I WISH I WOULD BE STRUCK BY LIGHTNING AND DIE."

I…didn’t even realize it was possible for my sims to get the lamp? Do I even have that EP?

Ghost!Ariel:  “MORE WEEDS!?!?!”

I… What do you keep getting up to, Jonas!? Why can’t I keep track of what my heir keeps doing!?

GENES PLEASE?

:D :D :D

STOP FAILING YOUR ASPIRATIONS DON’T YOU KNOW THAT YOU WILL DIE AN EARLY DEATH IF YOU KEEP DOING THAT STOP IT

Jonas:  “Ma’am, might I suggest perusing our produce section?”

Customer #20548936:  “But I only came for some icecream!”

Jonas:  “But the nutritional value of produce can offset the negative attributes of your dessert!  It could be a delicious balancing act if you buy both.”

Making money and friends (and good reviews omg) like a madman.

YOU ARE MAKING THIS ESTABLISHMENT LOOK BAD, IVY.

GOOD GOD, HAVE SOME DECENCY.

Don't you even give me that look, Professor Ball.  Do not even.

EGGPLANTS!!!

YES, YES, YOU BEAUTIFUL BOY! COLLECT ALL THE EGGPLANTS NOW.

Well damn.

For those that are a little concerned about my excitement, eggplant juice gives the drinker a freebie skill point (randomized, so you never know what you’re gonna get).  It also constitutes as an entire meal, too.  

AND WE HAVE SO MANY EGGPLANTS AND SO MUCH EGGPLANT JUICE TO BE DRANK…DRUNK?

WHO CARES HOORAY FREEBIE SKILL POINTS.

Jonas:  “Whoa…what’s happening to me down there!?”

YOUR SECOND DOSE OF PUBERTY.

Except okay, wow, thanks Jonas.  He grew up into an adult and then my game promptly crashed.  

SO IT GOES.

But here, look! You guys, look! I got a screencap of one handsome adult Jonas Russo...

and a pretty lady friend? 

Oh my!

WHAT WILL COME NEXT!?

NOBODY KNOWS.

NOBODY.